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Chris Hemsworth Is Abs-olutely Kidding Himself By Telling Us What To Do

Hollywood hunk Chris Hemsworth has said if you can't find 20-30 minutes to work out you're lying to yourself.

This makes him sound very much like a bloke who is selling something -- AND OH, KNOCK ME DOWN WITH A FEATHER, HE IS. Hemsworth's Fitness app launches on February 11.

But above all, it makes him sound out of touch.

Here's what happens out here in the real world where we flabby suburban self-con artists are too unmotivated to do reps in expensive white singlets with a personal trainer while moody movie music plays.

We get up. We make breakfast and lunch for ourselves and our kids. We clean. We go to work. We work hard, and rarely to the clock. We come home. We cook. We clean more. We attend to domestic administrivia and/or other chores. We clean some more. We have a very brief conversation with our other halves which usually involves planning the children's lives. We brush our teeth and worry about how to afford the kids' orthodontics and whether they really need them anyway. We go to bed.

The next day, we get up and do it all again.

READ MORE: Chris Hemsworth: You're "Lying To Yourself" If You Can't Find Time To Work Out

Exercise? Well, this particular balding suburban slob walks 20 minutes twice a day between work and the train station. Oh, I aim to go for a run three nights a week but it's just not possible. One night every three weeks, more like.

For this, Hemsworth would think of me as a liar. Know what I think?

I think people who post pictures and videos of their fitness regimes on Instagram are up themselves.

Fitness is great. It's good for your body and your mind. But fitness has also become the greatest show of vanity in society today.

Fit people talk about their "rig" and their "guns" and their "six-pack", and these are all cool, feisty words oozing with overtones of health and vitality and general awesomeness.

They have their own lingo, and an attitude to go with it. Just today, I passed a bunch of young guys in the street and the one with the best body wore no shirt. How often have you seen that? People with good bodies want you to know it. Chris Hemsworth wants you to know it.

Here's what I want them to know: That in the 20-30 minutes they think I have free every day for exercise, I am actually helping my kids with their homework in the 18th hour of the day.

"I’ve stopped trying to think about who I have to be, or what kind of personality I need to have to succeed in this business," Hemsworth says in his interview in the UK edition of Men's Health magazine.

Good for you, Chris. Now stop trying to tell everyone else what they should be.