Is It Worth Leaving The House Once You Hit 30?
It seems people wear being a hermit as a badge of honour.
A lot changes when you turn 30. A LOT. (Farewell perky breasts, you will be missed.) It’s truly bizarre. When you’re over 30 you discuss the quality of the grout in your new house and your interest rate and… you enjoy it.
Over 30, a hangover is a near-death experience, you need life support the day after a night out. When you’re over 30 something always hurts: neck, back, wrists… something. You groan getting in and out of a car and you’re always tired.
All of these changes I more or less expected. And all of these changes, I more or less don’t mind.
But something has changed that I never thought would. It’s near impossible to hang out with your friends in a group. Is this just me or is this everyone, I wonder?
In my teens and my twenties doing a group wine tour, a house party, a weekend away or even a dinner with your friends was something you would do on the regular. Now, hanging in a group is almost as impossible as seeing Lena Dunham in a bra, and it sucks.
I think catching up with one or two friends is easy, but you just can’t seem to get more than four of your mates together for a group catch up! There seems to never be a good time for everyone. You try and organise it but someone has a work trip one week, someone is at a wedding the next and then you always have that friend who needs to be booked 12 months in advance. So, you just go bugger it. I’ll see you in 2030, bitches.
I mean, I think it’s for a lot of good and obvious reasons… like kids, work, work, work, events/parties, general life exhaustion, partners, distance... And for some reason when you get older it's harder and harder to leave the house if you don’t really have to. Plus, we all bail when we couldn’t be bothered -- because life is full on. But it sucks when people bail. (I’m not innocent here. Believe me. I am the queen of Netflix and sit.)
Is this the real issue? You've all seen the memes. 'The older I get the more I realise how much I love being at home and doing nothing' or 'I’m one of those people who is content staying in, watching TV in comfy clothes while everyone is at the beach/club'.
No one wants to go out anymore.
It seems people wear being a hermit as a badge of honour. (Again, I am guilty of this. I literally wrote those memes.) Or is it because work, commuting, kids, cleaning, cooking, money, everything combined just leaves you too fatigued to want leave the house if you don’t HAVE to? Your house becomes your refuge from the world and your phone and TV is stimulating (numbing) enough for you to not leave.
But, strangely, it’s not all doom and gloom, because I'm pretty sure that when you’re over 50 your social life, group catch ups and urge to leave the house sparks back up again. I say this because my mother is constantly drunk and on a cruise or weekend away with the girls. They even have meetings and hang outs before the event to plan the event. ”Karen is going to bring the pigs in blankets and Loraine is bringing the chardy. Deborah don’t forget the cheese and bikkies!”
Maybe we just have to try that bit harder to prioritise our friends and really consciously leave the house to be social. Or you could forget about your friends and be a hermit and reunite at 50 in the bingo room of a P&O Cruise.
This post first appeared on May 25, 2018.