The Most Batsh*t Insane Celebrity Conspiracy Theories
From death cover-ups to lizard people, the Internet can't get enough of conspiracy theories.
Conspiracy theories have been around since forever -- just look at the whole "Paul is dead" theory that kicked off decades ago.
In case you're not familiar, ~legend has it~ that in November 1966, The Beatles' Paul McCartney was killed in a traffic accident and was secretly replaced by a look-alike.
But to be fair, who DOESN'T love a wild conspiracy? Especially when you stumble upon an especially ~spicy~ one that involves lizard people *cough* Justin Bieber *cough*.
Given the prevalence of social media these days, conspiracy theories about celebs tend to spread like wildfire, snowballing out of control until they become a part of internet lore, never to be forgotten. EVER.
Here's some of the more batsh*t insane ones of the bunch. Enjoy!
Lorde Is a 40-Year-Old Woman
Basically, this all started after a 2014 interview with Rookie magazine, where Lorde casually mentions that the movie The Virgin Suicides "really resonated with me as a teenager. I mean, I am still a teenager."
To add fuel to the Lorde Age Truthers fire was a quote she gave to Vanity Fair, where she says "I'm actually 45."
While Lorde's New Zealand's birth certificate was later revealed, showing that the singer was in fact born in '96, it's still not enough for truthers, who have brushed of the document as doctored.
Stevie Wonder Isn't Actually Blind
This is the one that’s been memed to death. It comes after he was videoed following Paul McCartney's performance at the White House where he happened to catch a falling mic stand.
Stevie's a pretty good sport over the whole thing, even joking with TMZ that 2017 would be the year he finally revealed he isn’t actually blind.
“I flew a plane once, well actually twice,” he continued, adding “I actually landed the plane”.
Avril Lavinge Was Replaced By A Doppelganger
A blog called "Avril Esta Morta (Avril is Dead)" started off this whole theory back in 2012. It suggests that the 'Sk8er Boi' singer actually died in 2003 and was replaced by an actress named Melissa Vandella, who was hired originally as her body double for paps.
They go through a whoooole bunch of lyrics, overanalyse them, and analyse her freckles. The most hilarious bit of 'evidence' held by these believers is that Avril is "too punk" to marry Chad Kroeger of Nickelback fame...
Honestly, why'd these guys have to go ahead and make things so complicated?
Katy Perry Is JonBenet Ramsey
We all know the tragic story of JonBenet Ramsey, the six-year-old beauty queen who was murdered in 1996, of which the case remains unsolved to this day.
In what's probably the worst of the celeb theories, some believe that singer Katy Perry is JonBenet, seemingly based on the fact that they sorta-kinda-don't really look similar (there's also six years age difference), and that Katy once mentioned in her memoir, “Not that I was one of those stage kids. There was no JonBenét Ramsey inside of me waiting to burst out.”
Beyonce Was Never Pregnant With Blue Ivy
There's a couple of layers to this one. First up -- Beyoncé initially gave two dates for when she was expecting to have the baby, January 2012 and February 2012 (Blue Ivy was born on January 7, 2012).
Then in October 2011, when she sat on a chair during an interview for Sunday Night, her belly kind of... folded? Which made people think she was wearing some sort of prosthetic stomach.
Also, according to The New York Daily News, Bey and Jay Z apparently paid $1.3 million to "seal off and redecorate a wing at the upper East Side hospital" -- as well as the fact that there's no pics of Blue Ivy's birth (available to the public, anyway).
Justin Bieber Is a Lizard
Okay this is defs one of the funnier theories out there.
It all kicked off last year, when Perth Now reportedly published and removed a story with the headline “Hundreds Of Fans Claim They Saw Justin Bieber Turn Into Giant Reptile.”
Apparently, fans witnessed the Biebs turning into a huge reptile with “gross, coloured scales,” according to a BuzzFeed story.
Apparently, it even had a solid witness in the form of "a local skater " who said:
"He was hanging around with this big guy, his bodyguard I guess, and we were just staring because he kept turning into a huge reptile. His bodyguard was pointing at us, shouting that he’d kick our teeth in if we didn’t put our phones away.”
Perth Now later denied to BuzzFeed that they ever published it.
Via The Daily Dot.Then, there's the video of Bieber in court in 2014, where he is supposedly "blinking like a lizard."
Scooter Braun -- Justin's manager -- has since confirmed JB is “not a secret lizard person.” Phew! Glad we cleared that up!!
Nicolas Cage Is a Vampire
A Seattle-based found a photo from 1870 featuring a man that bears a resemblance to the Cage. He put the snap on eBay under the headline "Nicolas Cage is a Vampire," asking for $1 million.
"Personally, I believe it's him and that he is some sort of walking undead / vampire, et cetera, who quickens / reinvents himself once every 75 years or so," read the listing. "150 years from now, he might be a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host."
When Cage was questioned on David Letterman over the photograph, he said, "Now look, I don't drink blood and the last time I looked in the mirror I had a reflection." So there you go.
Taylor Swift Is a Clone of a Satanic Priestess
Around 2011, people started noticing the pretty uncanny resemblance between Tay-Tay and a woman named Zeena Schreck, who was, in fact, the High Priestess of the Church of Satan from 1985 to 1990.
Of course, people then deducted that she must be the reincarnated Schreck.
... Even though Schreck is still alive. Like, she's legit working in Berlin as an artist and magician right now.
Or she could be pumping out bops for her adoring fans across the world, whatever.
God, I love the internet!!